The View From The Mountain

Satanic Panic fills me with nostalgia for two reasons: first, it’s a movie that’s been produced by Fangoria, the horror movie magazine that’s made a triumphant return recently (and welcome back); and second, it’s a horror comedy, which I haven’t seen since the heyday of Fango back in the 1980s. To be sure, there were plenty of horror films with humorous moments, and more than a few really bad horror films that were unintentionally funny, but it’s rare to get a full-bore horror film--complete with blood and guts--that also serves a healthy dose of satire, as well. Satanic Panic takes aim at the greedy top one percent in our beloved capitalist society, stating outright that the reason they’re so rich and powerful (as well as being cold, soulless bastards) is because they worship Satan, and Old Scratch apparently takes very good care of his followers. The major catch is a human sacrifice must be made every now and then, and Danica (Rebecca Romijn), the leader of the cult, already had...

The Scooby Gang never had to deal with this crap! Satanic is one of those “see, I can act” movies. It’s a movie that features an actor or actress from a long-running TV show who wants to demonstrate that they can do something other than the same part they’ve been playing for years. In this case, it’s Sarah Hyland, the star of this flick who has played Haley Dunphy on the sitcom Modern Family (a series which I have not seen and, to be blunt, don’t really feel the need to see). I’m not bashing Miss Hyland for wanting to try something different--far from it, she’s to be commended for stretching her acting wings. And while I can’t compare her performance here with her work on Modern Family , I liked her performance in Satanic , where she does a superb job at playing the sympathetic “good girl” role in this horror film, sort of like Jamie Lee Curtis in Halloween . If only Satanic was as good as Halloween . Hyland stars as Chloe, who’s on a tour of Los Angles murder sites with her ...